The losing battle of the single mom

Restraining kids to their beds isn’t an option is it?  I need advice on how to keep my 4 year old from leaving her bed at night that also allows me to achieve a sane number of sleeping hours.  I told her that she could no longer sleep in her older sisters bed.  I want her to start sleeping in her own bed each night.  I spent an entire weekend painting and remodeling her room for her, I bought a bed, dresser, and a nightstand with a small tv.  The kid has it made, I slept in a sleeping bag my entire 2nd grade year and I didn’t have a dresser until I bought one when I was 18.  But does any of that matter? No.  She sneaks out of her room every night and crawls into her sisters bed.  I’ve tried to guard the door, I caught her twice last night but she is a night owl and always out last me!  I resulted to threats last night, I told her if I woke to find her in her sisters bed she would be punished.

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I woke up, went straight to her room, No Hailee?  Go to her sisters room look in bed, no Hailee?  Small heart attack, as I catch a glimpse of a small people on the floor.  It’s Hailee, sleeping in her sisters room on the floor.  I’m losing this fight.

Mixing pleasure with work 😏

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I’m supposed to be learning about the different structures of the skeletal system.  While taking pictures of each piece of bone to study later at home I took the most epic photo of this Mandible.  I’ve always loved photography and now I want to go around taking beautiful pictures of every piece of bone in class!  Well I’ve got to go back to work, tally ho!

We can’t be friends

img_3615I finally said exactly what I was thinking and it may have ruined everything.  Do you ever have one of those nights where you’re laying in bed, mentally reliving a conversation, and kicking yourself for all the dumb things you wish you hadn’t said?  That sums up how well I slept.  I was supposed to have breakfast with the guys and then hang out. It wasn’t supposed to be awkward since I had already seen Eli twice post dating.  We were cool.  Or so I thought.  When I got to breakfast Max had his girlfriend and little sister there, and then Aylssa Eli’s ex girlfriend was there too.  It sparked a little jealousy inside me since I knew that he still had a thing for her.  I try to listen to the advice others give me about if he doesn’t want to be with me then move on.  Yes I understand, logically that makes sense.  I’m not trying to get back together with him, I’m just not 100% over him so being in this situation was hard.  So I planned on saying that I had plans afterwards to donate blood for class so that I wouldn’t have to hangout afterwards.  Well guess what?  Jacob and Eli decided we would all go donate blood together and then hangout. Everyone decided to do a scavenger hunt at this place called Stover’s, it’s like a real life narnia.  There were 6 of us so we got split into teams of 2.  I got paired with Aylssa.  It ended up being fun and I saw why Eli liked her, she was funny, energetic, and witty.  Dang I hate her, but I really like her.  Ugh.  Since things were going good I decided to join the bonfire at the guys house afterwards.  I made the mistake of telling Jacob I had kissed someone else’s boyfriend.  Harsh judgement followed, which traveled to everyone there.  I blew it off and continued about the night.  Soon it was just Jacob, Eli and I watching YouTube videos.

This is where things turned ugly.  Jacob told me that Eli got beat up by some drunk chick.  Eli showed me the scratch marks and started to tell the story about his friend who got drunk and attacked him.  I was on his side, I hate girls who attack certain guys because they know they won’t fight back simply because they’re a gentleman.  However when I heard this girl was married, and her husband was upstairs sleeping while Eli was downstairs taking care of his drunk wife who was attacking him then, crying and begging him not to leave… I voiced my opinion, I told him that it wasn’t cool for them to judge me for kissing someone who had a girlfriend when he is hanging out with a drunk married woman.  Eli just looked at me and told me to get out of his house.  He continued to say they had been friends for a long time, and it was hard enough without my input.  Jacob changed the subject and then they turned on a movie.  Completely dismissing the get out of my house statement.  I sat there feeling so uncomfortable, I wanted to leave but I didn’t want them to know I was hurt.  So instead I sat there for 20 minutes watching this movie like a dufus, pretending nothing just happened.  The longer I sat there the harder I tried to hide the hurt.  My face was heated, eyes filled with tears, my throat was swelling closed so I finally got to courage to grab my stuff and walk out.  I didn’t say anything except to Jacob, which was, I’m leaving.  Eli texted shortly afterwards.

img_3648Even with an apology I can’t see myself comfortable entering his home anymore.  This is the end, I won’t be hanging out with them anymore.  I can’t allow myself to be around people who hurt me.  We can’t be friends.

The social life of a single mom

img_2006I get two weekends out of the month to myself while my kids go to their dads.  Thankfully I have a pool full of friends to hang out with during me time.  This weekend I’ll be with my pals Jacob and Colton.  They are pretty much the coolest guys you could ever meet!  However that also means I have to clean my house… I don’t realize how crazy of a mess my house gets until I decide to have company over.  I need some quick clean up tips… I’m too exhausted to actually have this social life thing going on.

img_3354         On top of trying to get my house clean I’m running around like a chicken with its head chopped off after my children.  This morning 10 minutes before we were supposed to leave the house for school my 10 year old daughter comes to ask me if she can wear something different.  I asked why and she says, “Well because today is 50s day and I’ve signed up for a sock hop”. So panic mode set in and I ripped through her closet like a maniac trying to piece something together last minuteimg_3355

For a last minute outfit, I’m pretty impressed with my bad self… feeling like supermom at the moment but I’m sure when they come home this afternoon I’ll be brought back down off my high horse during some everyday fiasco.  But for now I’ll live in the moment and applaud my small successes!

Secret Hideout

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My Secret Hideout

Growing up on 100 acres of land I had this special spot. My siblings and I discovered what would become our playground, safe haven, and above all our secret hideout. While playing outside one afternoon, we invaded the woods that edged the top of a hill. The area overlooked about 20 acres, including our home and the road we lived off. There was a tree that had been struck by lightening, giving it this bent shape which was perfect for sitting. My brothers sat atop this tree as the lookouts and spy’s while I decided to clean our new “home” by gathering fallen leaves and branches. As I swept the leaves together with my hands I noticed something sparkle. I moved more leaves to get a closer look, it was GOLD!!! Or so I thought at the time, turns out I found glittery gravel that people used back in the day for driveways. I alerted the lookouts and we quickly became treasure hunters for the day, whipping off our socks to shove the best looking rocks into them and smuggle them home for safe keeping in our underwear drawer. This place quickly became our new favorite place that we titled The Golden Rocks. It’s been 20 years and I still find myself wanting to runaway to hide, be alone, and think at my secret hideout. I’m a 28 year old single mother of 3, working full time while going to school full time… who wouldn’t want to run away? Writing down my trials, feelings, and experiences seems to be the best escape I’ve discovered so far, I figured the best way to get feedback and give out advice would be to create a blog. So here I have it my online Golden Rocks 😄.